{"id":126372,"date":"2024-11-16T04:18:45","date_gmt":"2024-11-15T21:18:45","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/hotvideos24.online\/?p=126372"},"modified":"2024-11-16T04:18:45","modified_gmt":"2024-11-15T21:18:45","slug":"im-worried-this-years-thanksgiving-trip-poses-a-threat-to-my-life","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/hotvideos24.online\/?p=126372","title":{"rendered":"I\u2019m worried this year\u2019s Thanksgiving trip poses a threat to my life."},"content":{"rendered":"<p> <script async src=\"https:\/\/pagead2.googlesyndication.com\/pagead\/js\/adsbygoogle.js?client=ca-pub-3711241968723425\"\r\n     crossorigin=\"anonymous\"><\/script>\r\n<ins class=\"adsbygoogle\"\r\n     style=\"display:block\"\r\n     data-ad-format=\"fluid\"\r\n     data-ad-layout-key=\"-fb+5w+4e-db+86\"\r\n     data-ad-client=\"ca-pub-3711241968723425\"\r\n     data-ad-slot=\"7910942971\"><\/ins>\r\n<script>\r\n     (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});\r\n<\/script><br \/>\n<\/p>\n<div itemprop=\"mainEntityOfPage\">\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"18\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5h9jk002vvgm267wbmuva@published\"><em>Care and Feeding is Slate\u2019s parenting advice column. <\/em><strong><em>Have a question for Care and Feeding? <\/em><\/strong><a href=\"https:\/\/forms.gle\/4BXEw8Wtcd7aAyXh9\"><strong><em>Submit it here<\/em><\/strong><\/a><em>.<\/em><\/p>\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"4\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5yy2300203571ez3dx137@published\"><strong>Dear Care and Feeding, <\/strong><\/p>\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"137\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5yy3s0023357195vgq5eq@published\">I am 38, 7-weeks pregnant with twins, and have one 2-year-old. I had a complicated pregnancy and delivery with my son. I live in a blue state where abortion is legal at all stages of a pregnancy. My parents live in a bordering state where abortion is banned at 6 weeks. It\u2019s a 3-hour drive to my parents from our city and about a 1.5-hour drive from their house to the border with our state. I\u2019m supposed to visit them for Thanksgiving (my brother and his family are also flying in from another state) when I will be approximately 12 weeks pregnant. I also have my company holiday party in December in a state across the country where abortion is banned at 15 weeks. I will be exactly 15 weeks pregnant at the time of that trip.<\/p>\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"99\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5yy5600273571s65u9xv1@published\">In both cases, I\u2019m terrified of traveling to states where abortion is prohibited during a high-risk geriatric pregnancy with twins. From my parents\u2019 house, my husband could drive us to the border quickly (within 1.5 hours) if there\u2019s an emergency. From the state I\u2019m flying to, it\u2019s a 2.5-hour drive to the nearest state with no abortion bans. I\u2019m not sure if we\u2019re getting a rental car yet. Should I even go on these trips? Am I being overdramatic? I\u2019m just concerned if I have a medical emergency, I won\u2019t be able to get the lifesaving care I need.<\/p>\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"3\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5yy6p002835716p66hc12@published\">\u2014Pregnant and Scared<\/p>\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"4\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5yy8q002a3571r5v2wzwm@published\"><strong>Dear Pregnant and Scared, <\/strong><\/p>\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"208\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5yybr002b3571blr6tnue@published\">You aren\u2019t being overdramatic at all. With the overturning of Roe v. Wade and the rise of restrictive laws on the state level, women are dying due to a lack of access to reproductive health care. As far as your holiday party goes, I would definitely skip it. Anything can happen, and the abortion ban in that state can prevent you from getting the treatment you may need, even if it\u2019s not a matter of terminating the pregnancy. With regards to your trip to see your parents this Thanksgiving, they may live 1.5 hours from the border, but how close is the nearest hospital once you cross? And what kind of reputation does that hospital have? I think you should factor that into your decision. Your parents might be four or five hours away from the sort of institution you\u2019d need to go to for care. Carrying multiples is already higher risk than being pregnant with one child, and you\u2019ve already had a complicated pregnancy before. I think the best thing for you to do for your piece of mind, and the health of you and your babies, would be to stay put until after you give birth. Perhaps your parents can come visit you this year instead.<\/p>\n<div class=\"prudie-google-form\" data-form-response-uri=\"https:\/\/docs.google.com\/forms\/u\/0\/d\/e\/1FAIpQLSeI516MVbV7en9S-8krL2zppY_GWq-qad7K_P7iUvxcD7t6vA\/formResponse\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/prudie-google-form\/instances\/cm3j5zld7002v3571kbqp4qry@published\">\n<p class=\"prudie-google-form__disclaimer\">\n      Please keep questions short (&lt;150 words), and don\u2018t submit the same question to multiple columns. We are unable to edit or remove questions after publication. Use pseudonyms to maintain anonymity. Your submission may be used in other Slate advice columns and may be edited for publication.\n    <\/p>\n<p>    <iframe class=\"js-hidden-iframe\" name=\"hidden_iframe\" id=\"hidden_iframe\" style=\"display:none;\" frameborder=\"0\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p class=\"slate-notification--success js-success-message\" hidden=\"\">Thanks! Your question has been submitted.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"4\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5yyhk002d3571vt1bopqi@published\"><strong>Dear Care and Feeding, <\/strong><\/p>\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"132\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5yyjp002e35716h7mt1vx@published\">I am a 14-year-old girl who is struggling with eating and body image. I can\u2019t stop worrying about my weight and calories, and it is starting to interfere with everything in my life, from my grades to my friendships. I can\u2019t concentrate on tests, and I miss out on socializing because I am skipping lunch. I am also bulimic. I feel lost and shallow for caring about something so superficial when people in this country are facing real, terrifying issues. I care about school because I want a career where I can do something with my privilege and contribute to society, but now I can\u2019t picture a future. How do I get rid of this potentially dangerous obsession? I am seeing a therapist, but it isn\u2019t helping. I haven\u2019t told my parents.<\/p>\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"1\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5yyn5002f3571xkr2aotd@published\">\u2014Worried<\/p>\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"2\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5yyoq002g3571mfhdpfnd@published\"><strong>Dear Worried, <\/strong><\/p>\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"191\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5yyqn002h35712p681ihy@published\">I can relate to your letter because I have battled disordered eating and body image issues since I was a little younger than you; I binged and purged for at least 15 years. I\u2019ve always known that I\u2019ve had a problem, but I\u2019ve refused to get help for any number of reasons, such as worrying that I would gain weight if I got better. There are few things I regret more than not telling my parents when I started to struggle. You must talk to your family, because you can\u2019t get past this on your own. You won\u2019t just wake up one day and feel okay with yourself; you\u2019re going to need to do serious work and you need support for that. Are you being fully honest with your therapist? When I was 16, I spoke briefly with a school guidance counselor about my bulimia, and then convinced her that after just a couple of sessions, I\u2019d stopped purging. Therapy can only work if you are completely transparent with your provider; if you have been and you\u2019re not seeing an improvement, then she may not be a good fit for you.<\/p>\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"94\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5yysu002i35711d9udma5@published\">In any case, the first step is to tell your parents so they can help you. Tell them everything; they need to know how these issues have controlled your life. You also have to decide that you don\u2019t want to live this way anymore. You have to prioritize your health, your happiness, and your future over what you think you\u2019re supposed to look like. These should be some of the best years of your life. You don\u2019t deserve to struggle like this. Please, tell your family what\u2019s going on so they can support you.<\/p>\n<h3 class=\"subhead subhead--none\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/subhead\/instances\/cm3j5yy2l00223571qpgxhq4o@published\">\n<p>Catch Up on Care and Feeding<\/p>\n<\/h3>\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"15\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5yyve002j3571ym5zw7ez@published\">\u00b7\u00a0<em>Missed earlier columns this week?\u00a0<\/em><a href=\"https:\/\/slate.com\/human-interest\/care-and-feeding\"><em>Read them here<\/em><\/a><em>.<\/em><br \/>\u00b7\u00a0<em>Discuss this column in the\u00a0<\/em><a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/groups\/slateparenting\/\"><em>Slate Parenting Facebook group<\/em><\/a><em>!<\/em><\/p>\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"4\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5yyx4002k3571j1eik60y@published\"><strong>Dear Care and Feeding, <\/strong><\/p>\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"168\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5yz1f002l35717s01xyrm@published\">My 10-year-old daughter is on the autism spectrum and has ADHD. She is very intelligent and, according to her psychiatrist, has a high IQ, but low emotional intelligence. She has a lot of anxiety and challenges making friends but otherwise does okay. Most people don\u2019t even realize she has autism, but was nonverbal \u201cby choice\u201d up until two years ago. Due to complicated issues, we switched schools last year. She had her heart set on the private school her best friend goes to; however, because of her anxiety, she couldn\u2019t complete the test required for entrance. We decided to go to a private homeschool tutor instead, with her brother. A LOT of her anxiety disappeared! She\u2019s a different child! Instead of crying every day and having multiple meltdowns a week, she\u2019s been a very happy child. Everyone has noticed a difference. We do playgroups, therapy, and social activities like drama and art classes in the afternoon. 90 percent of our challenges disappeared or became more \u201ctypical\u201d 10-year-old issues.<\/p>\n<aside data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/in-article-recirc\/instances\/cm3j5h9jk002xvgm221rbewxx@published\" class=\"in-article-recirc\" data-via=\"article-inline_recirc-section-advice\">\n<ol class=\"in-article-recirc__list\">\n<li class=\"in-article-recirc__item\">\n          <a href=\"https:\/\/slate.com\/advice\/2024\/11\/dear-prudence-thanksgiving-condition.html\" class=\"in-article-recirc__link\"><\/p>\n<p>            Help! My Sister-in-Law Has Offered to Save the Family Thanksgiving. But Her One Condition Is Tearing the Family Apart.<br \/>\n          <\/a>\n        <\/li>\n<li class=\"in-article-recirc__item\">\n          <a href=\"https:\/\/slate.com\/advice\/2024\/11\/fix-it-mommy-care-and-feeding.html\" class=\"in-article-recirc__link\"><\/p>\n<p>            My Son Expects Me to Wreck My Nest Egg to Fix His Absurd Financial Mistakes<br \/>\n          <\/a>\n        <\/li>\n<li class=\"in-article-recirc__item\">\n          <a href=\"https:\/\/slate.com\/advice\/2024\/11\/daughter-husband-fight-christmas-parenting-advice.html\" class=\"in-article-recirc__link\"><\/p>\n<p>            Our Daughter and Her Husband Got in a Devastating Fight Five Years Ago. We\u2019re the Ones Left Paying the Price.<br \/>\n          <\/a>\n        <\/li>\n<li class=\"in-article-recirc__item\">\n          <a href=\"https:\/\/slate.com\/advice\/2024\/11\/wife-secret-past-evidence-dear-prudence-advice.html\" class=\"in-article-recirc__link\"><\/p>\n<p>            Help! I Still Have Evidence of My Wife\u2019s Secret Past. She Has No Clue.<br \/>\n          <\/a>\n        <\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<\/aside>\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"152\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5yz4a002m3571us911iwt@published\">My problem is this. She wants to try the test again and attend that private school next year. I have concerns. Her friend was bullied badly this year, and I was NOT impressed by how it was handled. Her friend is a \u201ctypical\u201d kid. They don\u2019t have any programs for kids working ahead, and I think her school is behind. My daughter is working on multiplying fractions, and her daughter\u2019s class is still on basic multiplication. I\u2019m worried she\u2019ll be bored. Not to mention, I\u2019m concerned about all of the anxiety and how they would handle it if she had a panic attack. I wasn\u2019t impressed with their response during the test. Their response was \u201cShe\u2019ll have to figure it out.\u201d What do I do? She doesn\u2019t want to go anywhere else and we looked at all the local schools this year. She said it\u2019s that one or she\u2019d rather home school.<\/p>\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"2\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5yz5s002n3571xr0p7puf@published\">\u2014School Decisions<\/p>\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"3\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5yz9x002o3571roo5wjsz@published\"><strong>Dear School Decisions, <\/strong><\/p>\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"166\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5yzbv002p3571ukhl4km2@published\">While it\u2019s important to take your child\u2019s desires into consideration with regards to school, sometimes you simply have to do what you think is in their best interest, even if they disagree. It doesn\u2019t sound like this private school is a good fit for your daughter, and you\u2019ll have to explain that to her honestly. Her friend may not want her to know that she was bullied, but you can tell her that you have heard stories about kids getting picked on there and that the school didn\u2019t handle them well; speak to her friend\u2019s parents and see if she would be willing to talk to your daughter about her experiences. You can also let her know that you don\u2019t believe the school is equipped to handle her anxiety issues, and that it\u2019s important that she is in an environment where she is fully supported. Offer to let her consider other schools in the area if she\u2019d like, but put your foot down about this one.<\/p>\n<p class=\"slate-paragraph slate-graf\" data-word-count=\"2\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/slate-paragraph\/instances\/cm3j5yzfj002q3571pism15mi@published\">\u2014 <span class=\"slate-paragraph--tombstone\">Jamilah<\/span><\/p>\n<section class=\"newsletter-signup  \" data-turnstile-sitekey=\"0x4AAAAAAAapdPWOG3kR2_qF\" data-list=\"Advice\" data-uri=\"slate.com\/_components\/newsletter-signup\/instances\/cm3j5h9jk002yvgm2k0orngqb@published\">\n<p>\n        <svg width=\"13\" height=\"20\" class=\"newsletter-signup__arrow\">\n          <use xlink:href=\"http:\/\/slate.com\/media\/components\/newsletter-signup\/sprite.svg#arrow\"\/>\n        <\/svg><\/p>\n<p>      The latest sex, parenting, and money advice from our columnists delivered to your inbox three times a week.\n    <\/p>\n<\/section>\n<\/div>\n<p><script type=\"text\/javascript\">\n!function(f,b,e,v,n,t,s){\nif(f.fbq)return;n=f.fbq=function(){n.callMethod?\nn.callMethod.apply(n,arguments):n.queue.push(arguments)};if(!f._fbq)f._fbq=n;\nn.push=n;n.loaded=!0;n.version='2.0';n.queue=[];t=b.createElement(e);t.async=!0;\nt.src=v;s=b.getElementsByTagName(e)[0];s.parentNode.insertBefore(t,s)}(window,\ndocument,'script','https:\/\/connect.facebook.net\/en_US\/fbevents.js');\n<\/script><br \/>\n<br \/><script async src=\"https:\/\/pagead2.googlesyndication.com\/pagead\/js\/adsbygoogle.js?client=ca-pub-3711241968723425\"\r\n     crossorigin=\"anonymous\"><\/script>\r\n<ins class=\"adsbygoogle\"\r\n     style=\"display:block\"\r\n     data-ad-format=\"fluid\"\r\n     data-ad-layout-key=\"-fb+5w+4e-db+86\"\r\n     data-ad-client=\"ca-pub-3711241968723425\"\r\n     data-ad-slot=\"7910942971\"><\/ins>\r\n<script>\r\n     (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});\r\n<\/script><br \/>\n<br \/><div data-type=\"_mgwidget\" data-widget-id=\"1660802\">\r\n<\/div>\r\n<script>(function(w,q){w[q]=w[q]||[];w[q].push([\"_mgc.load\"])})(window,\"_mgq\");\r\n<\/script>\r\n<br \/>\n<br \/><a href=\"https:\/\/slate.com\/advice\/2024\/11\/thanksgiving-trip-fears-care-and-feeding.html\">Source link <\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Care and Feeding is Slate\u2019s parenting advice column. Have a question for Care and Feeding? Submit it here. Dear Care and Feeding, I am 38, 7-weeks pregnant with twins, and &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/hotvideos24.online\/?p=126372\" class=\"more-link\">Read More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-126372","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-health","entry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/hotvideos24.online\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/126372","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/hotvideos24.online\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/hotvideos24.online\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hotvideos24.online\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hotvideos24.online\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=126372"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/hotvideos24.online\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/126372\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/hotvideos24.online\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=126372"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hotvideos24.online\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=126372"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hotvideos24.online\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=126372"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}